The Mean Girls of CNN

Mean Girls

Anybody else notice that the women on CNN act like the nasty high school Mean Girls?

It’s gotten so bad, I’m surprised they’re not all named Heather.

Did they got off at the wrong studio on their way to audition for The View?

I’m sure you’ve seen this utterly puke-inducing bit of high school mean girl drama courtesy of CNN bimbo Kate Bolduan.

“Do not attack the stellar reporters of CNN!”

Hey, Kate. Maybe you should key his car on your way out. Then have your boyfriend pee in his locker.

What an imbecilic display of adolescent impetuosity.

Okay, yeah. It was a guy who said, “Carl your embarrassing yourself.”

Which only goes to prove even the beta males on CNN are high school Mean Girls too.

Earth to the Mean Girls of CNN: Carl Higbie just cleaned your clock.

But of course, these wretched, hateful shrews don’t want to actually discuss his points. Instead, in typical mean girl fashion, they say, “Whatevs” and flounce away in a snit.

Stop and marvel at this. Once billed as “the most trusted name in news,” CNN has become the popular girls’ table in the cafeteria.

That’s what happens when you hire a bunch of bubble-headed dames with absolutely no understanding of history, context, or journalistic integrity. Not to mention a complete lack of respect and common sense.

Kate Bolduan is thirty-three years old. Thirty-three going on sixteen.

And believe it or not, Kate actually possesses a bachelor’s degree in journalism.

Which, when you think about it, only confirms what I’ve been saying for years. College does nothing to prepare you for the real world.

If this dingbat can actually rise to the anchor chair at a cable news network when she’s this snippy and thin-skinned, CNN has a really, really low bar.

And then there’s Brooke Baldwin.

She’s the CNN anchor that showed the utmost journalistic integrity by breaking down and crying when a white guy on her program used the “n-word.”

Oh, the humanity! She just couldn’t go on with the segment. That’s how traumatized Brooke Baldwin was.

Apparently the Mean Girls of CNN demand that the news of the world be free of micro-aggressions and trigger words – not to mention, you know, news.

At this rate, CNN will be the only cable news channel to be declared a Safe Space.

I’ve gotten to the point where just seeing a video clip from CNN makes me feel like I’m back in high school.

Except, instead of being intimidated by the mean girls, I find them all manner of ridiculous.

Let’s face it. The tactics of high school Mean Girls only work in, well, high school.

When adults (or borderline adults in the case of Kate Bolduan), behave this way, it makes them look all kinds of stupid.

Do everyone a favor ladies. Either grow up and act like, you know, journalists, or join the bitchy broads from The View.

And if The View doesn’t want you, here’s a thought. Why not just go back to high school?

Since, apparently, you never left.

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