Old 7-Minute Joe

Old 7-Minute Joe

In an effort to minimize the likelihood of gaffes, blunders and verbal diarrhea from their presumptive nominee, Team Biden has limited Joe to a 7-minute stump speech.

So while President Trump is getting up on stage and speaking off the cuff for an hour or more, Old 7-Minute Joe does a quick how-do-you-do then gets shuffled backstage — leaving an army of surrogates to handle the bulk of his campaign events.

BUT DON’T YOU DARE QUESTION HIS MENTAL ACUITY!!  THAT’S A CONSPIRACY THEORY PUSHED BY RUSSIAN BOTS!!!

Next week’s CNN debate has been changed from two candidates standing behind podiums fielding questions from moderators to two candidates sitting behind a table while audience members (no doubt carefully chosen by CNN/DNC) ask questions.

The better to hide Old 7-Minute Joe’s inability to stand for three hours, no doubt.

If Bernie fails to get taken out in the next few weeks, they’ll have to go to a 7-minute debate.

In fact, I’m thinking the primary reason Democrats are trying to hasten Bernie’s exit from the race is to prevent their cracked, unwell vessel from having to endure the rigors of campaigning against an actual opponent before they hand him the nomination in July.

Meanwhile, last night Fox News hosted a townhall event with Bernie Sanders.

Will 7-Minute Joe do the same?

Apparently not.

The sooner Bernie drops out, the sooner Old 7-Minute Joe can go into hiding until the convention.

Like I said last week, the old Obama gang wants back in power.  And they’ve decided their best chance of getting there is using Old 7-Minute Joe as their vessel.

I don’t think demented old Joe has any idea this is going on.

Which might explain why the person most stunned by Biden’s sweep on Super Tuesday was Joe Biden himself.

He has no clue what’s happening behind the scenes.  None whatsoever.

They can’t trust Joe enough to fill him in on the plan because he just might blurt it out during his 7-minute stump speech.

In a way, I pity the old cooter.

He’s being used, controlled, handled and carefully guided.

It really is elder abuse.

They’ve been keeping a tight lid on the guy for months. But you can’t hide 7-Minute Joe forever.

Eventually voters are going to notice that the Democrat’s presumptive nominee isn’t out there campaigning.

When Biden gets the nomination are they going to limit his acceptance speech to seven minutes?

And what the heck are they going to do when it’s time for Old 7-Minute Joe to face off with President Trump in the debates?

Don’t underestimate just how damaging it was to Hillary’s campaign that the world got to see her stumble, collapse and get tossed into the back of the Scooby van like a sack of potatoes.

Voters aren’t exactly eager to vote for someone who is falling apart before their eyes.

So while they might be doing everything they possibly can to limit his public appearances while the media downplays his “senior moments,” eventually voters are going to notice that the guy ain’t all there.

Eventually, the Democrat nominee is going to have to campaign against Donald Trump.

Don’t doubt for a moment that this is the reason the Democrats and media handmaids are ginning up fear and panic over the Wuhan Virus.  In the same way you might puree a senior citizen’s food to make it easier for him to eat, the media is beating up on President Trump as much as possible in order to tenderize him before old senile Joe has to face him.

It’s also why they’re cheering on a possible recession and stock market crash – not to mention demanding President Trump cancel his rallies due to the Wuhan virus.

They’re trying to create every advantage for that demented halfwit they insist on dragging over the finish line.

It’s a deeply foolish strategy because President Trump thrives in adversity.  He does his best work when he is a target of relentless attacks.  Have these guys learned nothing over the last three years?

It also doesn’t help their strategy that the news media and the Democrats have spent Trump’s entire first term fearmongering over every little thing – from RussiaGate to the tax cuts to Net Neutrality to Kavanaugh to their Shampeachment. By now they’ve cried wolf so many times, nobody trusts them anymore.

On top of that, they’re insane if they think they can convince us that Joe is totally healthy and up to the task. Do they not realize we can see for ourselves that he can’t make it through a 7-minute speech without incomprehensible gibberish dribbling out of his mouth like rice pudding?

Who you gonna believe? Us or your lying eyes?! Nothing to see here!  Move along!

Speaking of incomprehensible gibberish: Please tell me this post made sense. Thanks to this hideous flu, I’ve been running a fever for three days straight and don’t trust my own proofreading skills. If what I’ve written is as muddled as old Joe, I’m sorry.

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9 thoughts on “Old 7-Minute Joe

  • March 10, 2020 at 11:18 am
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    You should get your rest there’s a deadly virus going around everybody who comes into contact with it has a 98% chance of survival

  • March 10, 2020 at 11:59 am
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    Your post made total sense!.. brilliant as usual. You’re a better writer when ill than most when perfectly healthy. You and Kurt S are the two best writers on the planet. Keep it up.

    • March 10, 2020 at 7:54 pm
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      I made that same point, yesterday. Hopefully you and others that agree with us make it a point to support amazing people like Dianny and Kurt.

  • March 10, 2020 at 12:30 pm
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    Thanks for this spot on take of Old Joe B. Glad you can still write and think! Hope you feel better each and every day.

  • March 10, 2020 at 2:20 pm
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    And today is a whole new day for the Biden.

  • March 10, 2020 at 2:26 pm
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    Wait… your posts are supposed to make sense?

    I just come here for the pshops. 😉

    Be well.

  • March 10, 2020 at 10:21 pm
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    Seven minutes? Ha! Maybe nearly five if an aide doesn’t put the HotShot to his arse. Also in the NEWS, Politico reports THE PATRIOT Retort is a fake news site according to my Bing search. I know better.

    • March 10, 2020 at 10:25 pm
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      Also I have another grandbaby. We have a photo of me and him when I first held him. It’s priceless, I’m partial. I would like to use it as an avatar (I think that’s it) to show who I am. How can I do that?

  • March 11, 2020 at 7:01 am
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    I have learned to dislike liberals because of there strange ideas of what works. I have developed pity for old Joe Biden it is obvious that he is not all there and hasn’t been for years, one reason Obama kept him in the shadows as much as possible. Like him or not Old Joe has worked for the DNC for 30+ years and they are using him like disposable adult diapers, that is a shame.

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