Avenatti pulls out

Avenatti pulls out

Whelp so much for that.

The creepy porn lawyer Michael Avenatti has decided not to run for President in 2020.

Now what the hell are we going to do for fun?

Avenatti made his announcement on Twitter – which coincidentally is the only place in the universe where he is even remotely popular.

Here’s the statement he tweeted:

Avenatti statement

“I don’t make this decision lightly?” To be honest that’s a bit of a surprise.

If only he didn’t take baselessly accusing a Supreme Court nominee of gang rape so damn lightly.

Now if I had to guess, I’d say Avenatti’s family can only take so much of this guy’s non-stop clown show. He’s a black hole of buffoonery from which, I’m sure, they would really like to escape. And running for President would only make that black hole even larger.

But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed.

Given how routinely this doofus jumps the shark, his running for President was bound to bring us endless laughs.

Now we’ll be stuck with John Kasich for comic relief.

And that just won’t be the same.

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3 thoughts on “Avenatti pulls out

  • December 4, 2018 at 2:27 pm

    True. Kasich isn’t really very funny at all.

  • December 4, 2018 at 4:18 pm

    Really! I’m so disappointed. He was such a great source for laughs, and now we’re left with that stinking of a son-of-a-mailman. Maybe Biden will throw his hat in the ring. He’s always good for some deep belly laughs.

  • December 5, 2018 at 5:40 pm

    We might have Joe Biden.
    Before he was V.P., he was better known as “The Dumbest Man In The Senate”
    If he can stop pawing underage little girls, for five minutes, maybe Uncle Creepy Joe will run.

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