Dancing Liz is more awkward than beer-drinking Liz

Have you seen the video of Dancing Liz Warren?

Brace yourself. It’s like watching your grandmother twerking.

The Democratic primary officially has a new cringiest moment! Thanks, @ewarren! pic.twitter.com/tJaFJzeVjr

— Eddie Zipperer (@EddieZipperer) August 23, 2019

Oh dear.

I’ve seen better dancing from awkward preteen white boys.

Hell, I’m a better dancer and I can’t dance.

Dancing Liz makes me cringe even harder than beer-drinking Liz.

She’s like America’s answer to Theresa May.

Is it the shared hairstyle that makes these women bad dancers?

Dancing Liz makes Elaine Benis from Seinfeld look like Ginger Rogers.

See, Dancing Liz is awkward and painful because Liz Warren is a stern, scolding fishwife. Her resting state is scowling and stiff.

So when Liz makes an attempt at “normal human behavior” it comes off canned, out of character and completely awkward.

Which is exactly how her beer-drinking Instagram moment looked.

Watching Liz dance leaves me with the impression that this woman has never once let down her hair and had some fun. But because she needs to appeal to voters, she forces herself to do things that are completely foreign to her.

Not since Hillary Clinton have I seen someone who has such a difficult time appearing human.

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I don’t think a Presidential candidate needs to be good at dancing on stage.  I don’t.

Instead, I think every candidate would be best served by simply playing to his or her strengths. Be genuine, authentic; embrace who you are.

Dancing is not one of Liz’s strengths. Nor is it in any way authentic.  The same can be said of making Instagram videos from her kitchen while awkwardly drinking from a beer bottle.

The problem is, Liz’s one and only strength is shrilly lecturing while talking down to people.

And since most Americans don’t respond well to a scold who hectors and harangues them like Mommy Dearest, Liz is forced to overcompensate by pretending to be hip, with-it, relaxed and relatable.

But she’s none of those things.  So when Liz does something like dance or swill beer from a bottle, those everyday human activities look about as natural on her as tits on a bull.

Relatability isn’t learned.  You either have it or you don’t.

And I don’t think Liz Warren has it.

—

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