Someone ironed Hillary’s face

Joe Biden isn’t the only one who had a little work done recently.  From the looks of it, Hillary Clinton made a visit to the cosmetic surgeon as well.  Either that or someone ironed Hillary’s face.

You can see the pictures over at the Daily Mail.  But prepare yourself.  It’s the most frightening fizzogg since Lion Head lady.

Someone ironed Hillary’s face

And while Hillary’s neck, lower face and eyes are still as wrinkled as ever, the slope from her lower eyelids to her cheeks is as smooth as a baby’s ass.  It looks like whoever ironed her face either got bored and stopped before he was done, or Hillary decided unnaturally smooth cheeks surrounded by a sea of wrinkles was just the ticket for a night on the town.

I mean look at that!  That’s just unnatural.

The photographer shouldn’t have taken such a close-up shot of her.  From a great distance her ironed face and wrinkled jowls might not be so alarming.  But up close?  Oh, honey.  No.

Truth is, that picture of Hillary looks like a crudely airbrushed photo — less “Maybe it’s Maybelline,” and more “Maybe it’s Photoshop.”  The skin tone is all wrong.  And the inhuman smoothness just looks fake.

Now some people think Hillary getting her face ironed is a sign that she plans to enter the 2020 race.  But if that’s the case, then once again I am convinced that Hillary has no friends.

Because no true friend would encourage a seventy-two-year-old woman to go out in public looking like her cheeks are formed from Play-Doh.

Say, do you think if you mashed Hillary’s cheeks down on the funny papers the print would come off?

Of course the Daily Mail – which has a long history of gushing over hideous things (see their praise of Michelle Obama) – says Hillary “looked wonderfully youthful.”

“Wonderfully youthful?”  Are they serious with this?

I think the phrase they’re grasping for here is “hideously inhuman.”

Listen, I get it.  I’m 56 years old and have lines around my eyes.  My skin no longer has the flush of youth. Instead it has the flush of Lupus.  But as I am neither vain nor crazy as a Betsy bug, it would never occur to me to get my face ironed.  And I certainly wouldn’t flatten one portion while leaving the rest as wrinkled as a linen shirt stuffed at the bottom of a hamper.

If Hillary believes this improves her looks, then she’s even more delusional than we thought.

Just how desperate is she to lose a third Presidential election? How much public humiliation is she willing to endure?

Well, enough to willingly turn her face into some sort of science experiment gone wrong apparently.

Though I’m sure this ironed face look of hers will help Hillary secure the coveted Miami Beach divorcee vote.

And that’s something, right?

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12 thoughts on “Someone ironed Hillary’s face

  • December 15, 2019 at 10:22 am

    Hey, even if you have the flush of Lupus. I still think you’re a sexy girl.
    Intelligence is a very sexy thing.

  • December 15, 2019 at 10:32 am

    I guess her testicles finally dropped.

    • December 15, 2019 at 10:36 am

      Or that’s where she hides Bill’s testicles.

      • December 18, 2019 at 6:26 am

        They’re in a jar. On the mantel. She got a little carried away after the Lewinsky thing.

        She leaves them there as a reminder after all these years.

  • December 15, 2019 at 11:15 am

    I was thinking it was photos shopped, although she did probabaly have her cheeks done. They obviously handed her off to some inexperienced photos hopper though. She looks even more hideous than usual. More like the puppet thing from thr Saw movies lol.

  • December 15, 2019 at 1:31 pm

    Well, she finally made her outside match the inside (no further explanation needed).

  • December 15, 2019 at 4:36 pm

    If this is real, i.e. she has had some “work done”, this can’t possibly be the result she was shooting for. She can’t be pleased with this look.

    This is like if I went to get a tummy tuck and woke up from the anesthesia with a set of D cups.

    If we see the headline “Prominent Cosmetic Surgeon Commits Suicide” anytime soon I guess we have our answer.

  • December 15, 2019 at 4:39 pm

    For the love of Mike, I swear to God she looks like a Zanti! You have to post a pic of those two side by side!! On a side note, I think it was Silly Putty that lifted newsprint. Stuff that came in an egg shell like case.

  • December 16, 2019 at 10:04 am

    Bad taxidermy.

  • December 16, 2019 at 1:28 pm

    Looks like someone went overboard with a random orbit sander to me.


  • December 16, 2019 at 9:15 pm

    maybe it’s the double they used at the 9/11 ceremony.

  • December 19, 2019 at 1:31 am

    That’s actually her Pinocchio nose being repressed and causing those huge bags to pop out instead!

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